|Nancy Love Photography|
Today I walked into work to find 3 weeks worth of filing on my fucking desk! Apparently my manager decided to keep them and revise them at "his" time and dump the load on me today! Ughhh I was so pissed... Lucky for me my co-worker Kathy decided to give me a helping hand. What does this have to do with what is on my mind? Nothing and everything all in one pretty much..
I was remembering earlier today an observation I had while waiting for the subway on my way to the Hollywood Christmas Parade last year... the crisp smell of fall and a light yet very cold breeze that wept throughout the underground tunnels that ran the subway. I remember glancing over to see a man asking for money.. going from person to person.. ripped dirt-stained jeans and a jacket so thick it made his feeble body look buff. He approached me and asked if he I could spare him some change or some food.. I searched quickly in my bag for something to give him and came out empty handed.... when I looked up at him I saw the hunger in his eyes.. I ached with compassion for him.. and the fact that I didn't have any loose change killed me because I didn't want to be another face that just surpassed him with bull shit about not having money in my bag. I know there are many homeless out there.. but I happen to stumble upon this one and the look in his eyes just stabbed me with sadness.. Have you ever looked into someones eyes and in some way felt like you knew them without actually meeting them first??
I was tripping out at all the thoughts that we're running through my head as I looked into his eyes.. the things he must've gone though.. what lurks in the night that we do not see whilst we sleep in our beds.. the feeling of gratitude when given a taste of a bitten sandwich..
If I would've hugged him he would have probably thought of me as a freak show and never approach girls who look like me... but I felt like just hugging him! Like a little girl who sees a sad kitty and just wants to take it home and nurture it.. I couldn't help but feel that way and it drove me crazy! I walked over to my mom and asked her if she wouldn't mind I give him her "sun-chips".. and so she handed them over and I gave them to him.. he took them, smiled, and walked away saying "god bless"
I'm not much of a religious gal, nor am I against it.. But I took that as a Thank You.
He's hanging in there <3